


Should've Been A Con Man

by orphan_account



Category: JONAS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Thieves, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-05
Updated: 2013-01-05
Packaged: 2017-11-23 17:17:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/624625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick just wants to steal things. Joe and Kevin are not particularly helpful.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Should've Been A Con Man

**Author's Note:**

> This will probably be rewritten and expanded on at some point.
> 
> Or just have a sequel.

Nick sighed and gave Joe one of his best "why on earth am I related to you" looks.

"No, Joe, we are not stealing the Mona Lisa. That security system is enough to make _me_ nervous," he said, sighing again and reaching for more coffee. He was going to need it.

"But we need better targets! Jewelry stores don't give much," Joe whined and Nick groaned.

"Kevin, voice of reason."

"Can we steal Starry Night?"

Nick dropped his forehead to the table and resisted the urge to cry.

"No, we can't steal Starry Night. Starry Night is the most famous Van Gogh painting ever. We might almost be better off trying to steal the damn Mona Lisa. And, no, Joe, that doesn't mean we're trying to get the Mona Lisa," he said to Joe, before Joe could even open his mouth. "How about we go with a bank? There's that new one. I've scoped out their security already and everything."

"Oh, yeah, that one," Kevin said, nodding to himself. "I've been there. The layout's nice."

"Do you have a blueprint?" Nick asked. Kevin shook his head and gave him a "why would you ask such a weird question" look. "Fine, how about a scale model of the bank?"

"Yup!" Kevin pulled it out of his bag and set it on the table. Joe raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

"Right, then," Nick said, looking over it and getting out a marker. "They have cameras here, here, and here..."

* * *

"Stella Malone, can we ask a favor?" Stella just gave them a look and pointed to a pair of duffel bags.

"Everything you'll need for a bank robbery. Macy's double-checking the security schematics now, as well as assembling what weapons you'll have. And you know Macy. Nothing lethal and if you kill someone, she'll kill you, so try not to kill anyone," Stella said, gesturing to Macy's office.

"How is Macy?" Nick asked, looking up from where he was digging through the bags.

"Still dating me. So don't try, Nick," Stella replied, smirking and sipping her smoothie. "Oh, and Joe, rip another outfit and your next set of coveralls will be spangled." Joe's eyes widened and he nodded.

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good. Macy!"

"Relax, Stell, I'm right here," Macy replied, coming out of her office and handing a knife to each of them. "You all know hand-to-hand and how to knock people out. Don't kill anyone and I won't take a golf club to your heads. The knives are only in case of emergencies. And hey, Stella, any coffee for me?" she asked, kissing Stella quickly and gesturing to the mug in front of Stella.

"Yes, kitchen. Joe, I mean it. Spangled."

"Yes, ma'am."

* * *

"Joe, if you don't shut up, I'm going to punch you," Nick muttered, leaning over to glare down at his brother for a second before continuing up the ladder. "We're on a job and I _know_ you know how to be professional. Right?"

"Yes, Nick, I know. Jeez. Relax, will you?" Joe muttered, following Nick up the ladder and onto the roof. "As I recall, I was the one who dragged you into this."

"Yes, you were. Now shut up," Nick whispered, taking the bag from Kevin and walking over to the skylight.

Kevin and Joe set up the rig to lower Nick down and strapped him to it, both of them reassuring him that he'd be fine and they had plenty of experience. (Liars.) Nick glared at them and held onto the rope tightly, hoping like hell they wouldn't drop him and muttering to himself.

"I should've just become a fucking con man."


End file.
